John Yakopovich-1st winner
It gives us great pride to announce the first recipient of the Lester Brothers sponsored, "Jeffrey (Jeff) Spence Academic Scholarship."
Ohioan John Yakopovich wins the prize! The Board of Directors voted unanimously to choose his essay. He spoke eloquently about his older brother Anthony, and how his death has affected him and his family. In his own words, he "strives to end the stigma!"
Thank you so much for sharing your inspiring story with us, John; it will have a profound effect on many people. Anthony is a man of whom you can be justifiably proud.
READ HIS STORY
I wanted to start out by thanking you for this opportunity of being awarded your scholarship. The unfortunate part is we both have suffered a great loss of a loved one. For me... It was my older Brother, Anthony. I will be sharing with you our heartbreak of losing him, along with telling you about him and celebrating his wonderful life. Although he left us way too soon we are still living in his light and miss him every day.
I was young when my older brother’s addiction to Heroin began. I was only 9 years old when it all began. My brother was 8 years older than I was and it began when he was only 17 years old. I recall knowing something had happened but for the most part, my younger sister and I were both shielded from the nightmare that was about to be introduced to my family. My mom was protective of us and stood strong and by my brother’s side. Looking back I can see the stress and fear that she lived with. His addiction would span over 9 years. As you can imagine there were many ups and downs along this long journey.
READ HIS STORY (Cont)
He was arrested at the age of 17 with a few other kids for possession. He went through the court system as a juvenile and was sentenced to house arrest and my mom got him into a place called New Directions, an inpatient rehab facility not too far from our home. From what I recall Anthony was gone for months and months. My mom would make the weekly trip there for the family group sessions and come home both exhausted and optimistic. My sister and I were sad and missing him, we were told some of what was going on. I remember hearing things like... your brother made mistakes and got into trouble and was getting help. We finally got to go visit him. The rehab allowed the patients to leave once a week and have dinner out with family. I remember being so excited to see him and he seemed fine and normal to me. We had such a fun dinner and spent time laughing like the good old days.
A few more weeks past and Anthony came home from New Directions. He was out just in time to celebrate his 18th birthday. We all celebrated him and being home. We all felt happy and optimistic that the "mistake” and the" trouble” were past us and we would get back to normal. Nothing could be future from the truth.
My next memory was that winter and getting a call that Anthony had been in a bad car accident...He had tried passing someone on a hill and ended up flipping his car 4 times. He was taken to the hospital and walked away without a scratch. He had lost a good friend months earlier to an overdose and he said he felt his presence with him....like a guardian angel. What we didn't know was the Anthony was already back to using and was rushing to meet someone to make a drug purchase.
The next few years are a blur....I was a young boy just wanting my older brother around to play catch with and go hiking and swimming. I do have so many great memories with my brother but long for the ones we will never get to experience. We miss him at our family vacations... He was so funny and always brought laughter to everything. We both share in the love of physical fitness and later in life would go
to the gym together. Anthony had become a physical trainer and introduced me to the benefits of working out and we shared this passion. I miss him every day at the gym. Although I know he is proud and watches over it still does not take away the pain of his absence.
When I look back at the 9 years he struggled, I recall being upset and mad at him because he would steal from me. To feed his habit, he would steal my playstation games and sell them, he would also get caught stealing from our piggy banks. My mom would catch him stealing out of her purse. It caused allot of anger and pain to see him doing this to us. As a young kid I didn't understand his illness...I just felt betrayed by my older brother...my hero ....the one I admired and looked up to.
He got busted a few times and got caught shoplifting. He did time in jail. I remember one time he went to court and was suppose to be home that evening but ended up being tested for drugs at the courthouse and he tested positive so they hauled him off and he was away for months. My mom seemed both relieved and stressed. I think the relief was due to the fact that he was locked up and couldn't use drugs.
Over the next few years there were countless rehabs and being arrested. He would be good for awhile and all would be normal again. Each time he would relapse and spiral out of control again I could see it tear my mother apart. She stayed strong for us tried to keep things as normal as possible for my sister and me.
My mom found a place in Detroit Mi, They specialized in this kind of addiction and it also introduced him to Christ. He was in Detroit for over a year. We would go visit him on weekends and he seemed at peace and ready to conquer the world. He came home strong and healthy. This lead to almost four years of sobriety. He would attend meetings and had a job and took the classes to become a certified personal trainer. He met and dated a great girl that we all really liked. I was getting older and I remember thinking my brother was such a strong person. I began to understand much more about his struggles and addiction. To me it always seemed like a choice but I discovered how wrong I was and that its truly a disease. One he fought with all his strength.
We may never know what would lead to the next relapse. He seemed to have everything he could have wanted. He was happy, had a fun job he loved, a loving family and great friends and a girlfriend who loved him in spite of his past. When he relapsed it came on fast and he ended up getting arrested, my mom tried getting him into a rehab and he just kept walking out and leaving. We finally got him in an out of state rehab where he could be safe and heal up. He had some very serious charges waiting for him. He completed a year in rehab and had spent the time in California. We all thought....this is it! He came home really strong and determined to win the battle. His year spent in California seemed like a dream to him. He got healthy and got to see and do so many fun things. Once he was back home he landed a good job at a gym and still had the court battle ahead of him. He went to court on March 11, 2020 and the judge sentenced him to six months in jail. We were all devasted. How could this be...he was clean and strong. This broke him...that night he reached out to someone and bought what he thought was heroin.... his last relapse. He was actually sold fentanyl. He took the lethal poison that night and my mom found his the next morning. He had died in his bed while watching TV.
An investigation was launched and the drug dealer was caught and went to jail He was sentenced to 4 years in jail, he was charged with corrupting another with drugs and was held accountable for causing my brothers death.
Some people say we got some Justice for Anthony. At this point we are all just sad and miss him. He passed away March 12, 2020. It has been over 1 year without him. I told you some of my story....my memories as a young boy and watching my brother and my family struggling. It was a nightmare ! Wouldn't wish on anyone. He was my brother and the funniest person I have ever met. He was dedicated and loving to his family and friends. We struggle to understand "why him" . I see my mother still cry often and keeping his memory alive in all we do.
That to go through my high school graduation without my brother by my side. I have decided I wanted to go to college and seek a degree in physical science. I want to help others in the best way I know-how. Have a passion for physical fitness and nutrition and it is all because of my hero.... my brother Anthony.
His funeral and memorial service are all a blur and celebrating our first Christmas without him were very bittersweet. He always loved all the traditions and the family gathering. We have a beautiful memorial in our home with so many pictures and beautiful memories of his life. My mom gets visits from a cardinal on a regular basis and she swears that it's Anthony visiting. These are the things we get to hold onto and most of all I have my memories of good times we shared and will always long for the times we don't get to share. The things I will miss out on. He will not get to be the best man at my wedding, watch me graduate from college, and be there cheering us on as we achieve our dreams.
We do this all in his honor and will always remember the good times. His smile and laughter still fill our hearts and minds. It was an honor to be able to share my story with you and although our story didn't have a happy ending we do have a little bit of peace knowing he is resting easy and flying high with the Angels. My family is protected by the very best guardian angel and we smile remembering him and miss him every day.
The other important point I wanted to let you know about, is how much Anthony's addiction and his journey had impacted myself, my sister, and my mom. My parents went through a divorce years ago and he is not as present during this difficult time. We all have been educated over the years and as I got older my mom and brother both shared more information on his addiction and disease. Any anger went away and all we were left with was compassion and love. He taught us all so much and his journey has kept me and my sister safe. We know all too well of all the dangerous drugs and the impact they can make on an entire family. We share his story whenever we can and try not to let the stigma shame us into silence. We are proud of Anthony and share his story to help others... He would love that and I know we make him proud every day!
In closing, I first want to again thank you for this opportunity. A scholarship to help with my education would be great....actually words don't quite describe how this would impact me and my family. His battle over the years and losing him has forever changed our family but we go on stronger and with him by our side.
Writing to you and telling you about my journey with my brother has been a great experience for me. I have been able to share what a great guy my brother was and how much he has impacted not only my life but so many others as well. My sister who is 15 months younger than me has the same story to share. We both will be attending Kent State University in the fall.